Blessing this Beautiful Goddess with Love!
by riyangendut
Summary: I felt something inexplicably soft, warm, and heavy on top of my body, along with the soft scent of lavender. What is this? A corpse? No it's still warm, so human body? Wait, this is me after all, I don't want to expect too much and be disappointed when it turns out to be Chomusuke, but it better be a girl, damn it!


**Yahoo, riyangendut here with another KonoSuba cringey fanfic :p I'm on a roll baby.**

 **Critics and suggestions appreciated!**

* * *

I woke up with a painful headache, no doubt hangover I got from last night's party.

I tried to sit up, but stopped when I felt something inexplicably soft, warm, and heavy on top of my body, along with the soft scent of lavender.

 _What is this? A corpse? No it's still warm, so human body? Wait, this is me after all, I don't want to expect too much and be disappointed when it turns out to be Chomusuke, but it better be a girl, damn it!_

I opened my eyes, and the color blue assaulted my vision.

It's Aqua's hair. She must be almost bald if this much of her hair were to be removed from her head.

 _Wait a second, this isn't_ only _her hair, why is her head on my chest?_

I moved my head slightly, just enough to see further down, careful not to wake Aqua up.

Her body was piled on top of me.

That fact alone, while enough to make my heart race, wasn't really problematic. I probably carried her half-consciously to my room after she got drunk. When you have an alcoholic goddess as a housemate, this kind of thing is bound to happen from time to time.

Both of us were dressed in the same way as the day of our birth.

In other word, we're stark naked, barring the blanket that covers both of us.

"Kazuma..." I froze as Aqua called my name, but apparently she was talking in her sleep.

 _Heeh, so she called my name in her sleep. That was pretty sweet._ I blushed a bit, but then shook the thought off my head. This is no time for that. I moved our bodies slowly, until her body was on the bed and I could move freely. The alcohol last night must be pretty potent that she didn't wake up.

I rushed to the bathroom and submerged myself in the lukewarm water.

 _Calm down Kazuma, just because she's on top of you naked when you wake up doesn't mean something happened the night before._ I tilted my head _. Wait, I feel like there's something wrong in my line of thought. She was on top of me. Naked. I have no recollection on how we ended up like that, well, I was really drunk last night so it can't be helped. But there are other people in this mansion. Putting that pervert Darkness aside, Megumin would certainly took care of us, she knows when to be considerate, after all. But what if she thought that "In this condition, being considerate is not interrupting them"? Aargh, just what happened last night?! Did I just crossed the line without even knowing? Did I just lost my virginity, and can't even remember anything about it?!_

I got out from the bath tub, dried my body and changed my clothes. _This was far earlier than the time I usually wake up. Now what option do I have?_

1\. Accompany Megumin for her daily dose of Explosion, use the moment when she's helpless to ask her about tonight.

2\. Ask Darkness forget that, anything that begin with "Ask Darkness" never has a good ending.

3\. Return to my room and act like nothing ever happened, tell her I slept in the floor. She might question the absence of her clothes, though.

4\. Return to my room and casually ask Aqua about what happened last night. Warning! Might result in slight concussion.

5\. Return to my room, throw myself on the ground and apologize profusely for whatever I did last night and for forgetting it. Warning! Might result in death.

"..."

Option 1 seems to be safest, but Aqua's route might be closed permanently if I choose to be with another girl right after something happened between us. But did something even happened?

It's not time to question it damnit, even if we didn't cross the line, something _had to_ happen last night for the two of us to end like this morning. _Something better happened, damn it!_

"Aah, screw it. Megumin!" I knocked noisily at Megumin's room.

"Yees, wait a second. Huh, Kazuma, what are you doing here?" different from her usual wizard attire, Megumin wore a cute white one-piece dress when she opened her door and scratched her messy hair.

"That's my line, why hadn't you prepared yet. Let's go cast your daily Explosion."

"Huh? Kazuma, did you ate something strange last night?"

"Apparently yes, which is part of the reason why I want to come with you."

"Fine, gimme a few minutes."

* * *

Thirty minutes later, we arrived to an empty plains just outside Axel.

"Explosion!" and a new crater formed in the middle of it. I gave the immobile Megumin a piggyback ride, and we started to return to the mansion.

"Hey, Kazuma."

"Yeah?"

"You want to ask about last night, don't you?" _so your high intelligence stat isn't just for show, after all._

"Y-yeah." my face is heating up. "Do you remember anything?"

"If by _anything_ you mean everything that happen after Aqua got drunk and blacked out, then yes, I remember everything. I'm the only one who wasn't drunk, after all. And no, I won't tell you."

"Fifteen thousand Eris."

"Do you think my information is so cheap?"

"A million and a half Eris."

"Don't you think you spent money too easily?! Fine, I'll tell you in great detail." I gave her a magical silver coin worth a million Eris and five coins worth a hundred thousand Eris.

"Ufufu, easiest money I've ever got. Okay, listen carefully." she inhaled "Nothing happened. It was Darkness' joke to strip both of you after you put Aqua on the bed and then you passed out on the floor."

"..."

"..."

"...you're a terrible liar, you know? Now tell me the truth or we'll eat cat and archwizard stew for dinner."

"You planned to cook me too?!" Megumin sighed "But I at least didn't lie when I said nothing happened, I watched you the entire time, see. The two of you were really drunk, you brought the half-conscious Aqua to your room, and then you stripped her because she was sweating profusely."

 _Wait._

"Shouldn't you stop me on that situation?!"

"Well, you did collapse on the floor right after."

 _No, I didn't, at least not until morning, as I woke up in the bed with Aqua on top of me. Something must've happened after she stopped watching us._

I sighed. _It seems like I have to talk to Aqua after all. No, in the first place, talking to her is unavoidable since we're living in the same mansion._ I reviewed the remaining viable options.

1\. Return to my room and act like nothing ever happened, tell her I slept in the floor. She might question the absence of her clothes, tell them I removed it because it was drenched in sweat. Use Megumin as witness.

2\. Return to my room and casually ask Aqua about what happened last night. Warning! Might result in slight concussion.

3\. Return to my room, throw myself on the ground and apologize profusely for whatever I did last night and for forgetting it. Warning! Might result in death.

 _Hmm, at first glance the first option is benign, and the third option was borderline. I have no problem lying to save my own skin, but I'll feel really awkward around Aqua, not to mention there are slight chance she remembered the real event, effectively sealing further advance in Aqua path._

 _Third option in other hand, well, it seems pretty standard, but why was its warning more severe than second option?!_

Steeling myself to take the risk, I choose the second option.

"Yoosh!"

"Wait, Kazuma, whoa!" I started to run, ignoring Megumin's shout from behind my back.

* * *

I went straight to my room after letting Megumin sleep at the living room. To my surprise, Aqua was still fast asleep in my bed.

I sat beside her, ignoring the fact that she wore nothing under the blanket, and I stared at her beautiful sleeping face.

"Kazuma..." I bent my body to move a strand of hair off her face as she rolled to her side, and slowly, my face got closer to hers.

 _Damn, why are you so beautiful?_ While thinking such, I kissed her forehead.

"Kazuma... !" Aqua opened her eyes, straight into mine.

"Good morning, my lovely goddess." she smiled, a tinge of pink could be seen on her cheek.

"..good morning."

 _Oh no, there's no way I could ask her about last night, I could die out of embarrassment!_

"Hey, Kazuma, your face is really red, do you have a fever?"

"N-no, it's probably because of the hangover."

She chuckled "You're a terrible liar, Kazuma." her hand reached to my face, "But you already know about that right?"

"Aqua..." her hand guided my face closer to hers, her sweet lavender scent permeated my entire being, invaded every shred of my mind.

"..." we kissed. It was a simple kiss, merely touching of our lips, but its sweetness exploded in my mind, painted everything white.

"I love you, Kazuma." her gaze fell into my eyes with affectionate looks, there's no doubt that her words were from the deepest part of her heart.

"I love you too." we kissed again, deeper, hotter, my brain was overwhelmed as I tried to imprint every single aspect of Aqua to my memory.

As we separated, she once again stared at my eyes. "I love you, Kazuma."

"Wha-" I my words fell short as I saw clear liquid droplets fell through her cheek. I embraced her head. "Please don't cry."

"It can't be helped, *sobs* I-I'm so happy." she circled her arms around my waist.

* * *

After we calmed down, she went to her room and changed her clothes.

 _Wait, I forgot to ask about what happened last night!_ Cursing my stupidity, I knocked the door to her room.

"Aqua?"

Seeing as all my options are depleted, I decided to go with the last option: throw myself on the ground and apologize for whatever I did last night and for forgetting it.

"Kazuma? What is it?" she asked while opening the door. I immediately executed my plan...

...by prostrating on the ground.

"I'm sorry about last night! I cannot remember what outrageous act I did to you, so I would be really happy if you tell me what happened!"

 _Aah, mother, father, your son is now officially an idiotic pervert._ I waited for divine retribution to rain down from the silent goddess, but all I heard was giggles.

 _Giggles?_

I lifted my face to see Aqua's laughing face.

"Sorry, I can't hold it, it was too hilarious, even though I shouldn't laught, pfft." Aqua took a deep breath "Simply put, nothing outrageous happened last night."

"That's unnacceptable! ... no, wait, I mean, then how did we..."

"Yeah, nothing happened. Both of us did strip and slept in the same bed. But we fell asleep just before we could do anything else."

 _I don't know if I should be enraged, horrified, or relieved._

 _Aah! Even though I was so close! But I wonder, if I did it with her right then, I won't remember anything, so it'll be loss for me. So it's better this way after all?_

"Anyway, e-even though we're o-officially a c-c-c-couple, p-please wait until I'm mentally prepared, okay." I sighed at the madly blushing Aqua. I patted her head.

"Don't worry, we have all the time in the world." I kissed her forehead, oblivious to the sobbing sounds that filled the house...

* * *

 **I told you it was cringey. Well then, see ya in another occasion, strangers!**


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